Ever Since

I am no longer chasing

Dotted lines

Thinking they create

An entire shape

Knowing uncertainty

Is the purest form of life

As it embodies

What we aim to label


Section off

Believing small spaces

Can protect us

From an open galaxy

Lashing out

At the idea of existence

Beyond one’s self

I was thrown into this void

I’ve been spinning

Ever since


Of the Fittest

A struggle for survival

Nature at its cruelest state

When vines begin to strangle

Moonlight seals her fate

Determination of the hunted

Fights back against

Sneaky fiends

Trying to outsmart

Clever tricksters

More than once

She’s bitten forbidden fruit

Confused by the mixture of joy and remorse

Never wanting to fail

Sometimes continuing to breathe

Despite cracked ribs

Is the only victory

Embraced with inner zeal

The ones who climbed the highest mountain

Without obstacle or hardship

Surely don’t feel every ray sent down from heaven

That crackle beneath their feet isn’t quite as crisp

That tear falling down their cheek

Can’t be from a heart

Shredded by so much defeat

When the impossible is in her sights

The world becomes a maze

Some people are just made that way


Stuck in the sediment


Breaks free

For a moment

Against all odds

In opposition to the gravitational pull

Of circumstances

Beyond control

Seeing opportunity

Above whispy clouds

Yearning to be

In a place


Yet familiar

To simply have the same face



Until the moment snaps

Reminders become

Too persistent

Alternate dimensions

Give space

To dreams

And hope

And love

Most of all love

Stuffed in the cracks

Of life’s cruelty

Seen in every unintentional glance

Every slip of honesty

The realness we crave

Where vulnerability mixes with inspiration

I spend most of my time

On a precipice

Found between darkness and light

Warming Up

Stuck in a whirlpool

Of stagnation

Contradictory lives


Splitting open

Seamless curves

I want

I need

Still I avoid

Reflecting on blue eyes

Always those blue eyes

Feeling watched

By the trees

Strangers leaning in


At the same time

Completely unseen



As I melt under a

Plastic desk

Made of responsibility

I never sought to control

Wanting to be so much

More than what I am

Muscles ache

Eyes fall heavy

If I could get one ounce of interest from you

I feel I could dance across the sky

Shiny lavender marble

Reflecting ruffles twirling back

Not needing love

Is the lie of our age

A way to scab over open wounds

When we find ourselves alone


Follow truth

It will set you free

But it most certainly will

Not be painless

As it turns your protective layers

Inside out

Exposing hurt

On a torturous level

You will want to succumb to the pain

Of everything you’ve never had

But felt across the edges of your bandaged fingers

Realizing the blood on the floor is not your own

You’ve spread the destruction

As you tried to heal

Cocoon yourself in isolation

The body will become whole again

One mutated cell at a time

Every piece of you

Strewn across the wasteland

Will be returned

As your scarred body

Rises up

To complete daily thankless tasks

The sun will rise in watercolor

You will see every frame

As it was meant to be seen

Through tears earned

Never faked

It is only on the other side

Of self inflicted wounds

That you will realize what life always was

An accidental gift

Most never bother to unravel

Tossing shiny ribbons on the floor

Only to get to the next piece of waste

Hold it in both hands

Let it evaporate into your compromised skeleton

If your eyes aren’t filled with disappointment

You haven’t given it your all


It’s hard to find wisdom

When the sky never stops

Voids seen

In the shape of absences

Names spelled incorrectly

As you etch them above your

Non existent bed

None of us were meant to be here

As paternal hands shoved us out of their arms

Being overlooked

By so many eyes

Leaves too little love to survive

But air moves in and out

In an effortless motion

Giving us little choice

Other than when we count the way down in feet


And likelihoods

Time is spent wondering


When I was

Next to you

I guess that’s why I had trouble

When you walked away too

Too Tight

It doesn’t matter what is remembered

It’s what is felt that engraves our hearts

With silhouettes

Of shaky fingers

Tingly toes

Blushing cheeks

Uncomfortable glances

Across an open floor plan

First moves

Barely bend

Trying to maintain

Forged shapes

At least we tried

To contain the ocean

Between skipped


Never quite keeping time

Rather letting it run

Until there was nothing

But a mountain of sand

We could use

To create a shaky foundation

Stability was never


I fancied

Maybe something

I never had

My life fits in a hurried backpack

Dreams of holding


In another’s fleshy hand

Stick in my failing eyesight

Squinting to remember

A feeling of belonging

Sometimes I feel it

And hold on too tight


I think there’s something wrong with your eyes

Something wrong with how you see the world

With how you see me

Most of the time

I don’t take pictures with potential lovers

No no

They fool everyone

To see something imposssible

I love

The nitty


In between

How you look when you start

To have feelings

How you talk when

You wish I was yours

But you





Let me in

Fake filters

In between

Missed kisses

I see everything

The only thing


You and I

Is Y!O!U!

In all caps

Exclamation after



How I do

How I do

How I do

Think of you

Helicopter Kick

What have you got to defeat me

Sticks and stones

Exuberance at my decay

I’ve smelled the carpet

Fingers closing round my neck

I’m not afraid of defeat

Being a phoenix is my hobby

Insanity is my smokescreen

I will not be forced into submission

Not in this lifetime

Game over

One up life

I sense this victory

In every reincarnation

Your friends give you strength

I grew up in a closet alone

All I know is the strength of my own avocado shoulders

That support every plank

Meant to stabilize a house

Left in inheritance

Built upon sand

Nothing but insecurities

That leave indifference

That can stop shooting arrows

Set aflame

By your indignation

At my unwillingness to roll over

Belly exposed

I’ve seen the empty carcasses strewn across your lawn

My wisdom is founded

In the gritty truths of cracked cement

Unfair to poker face your first hand

If life hasn’t taught you this yet

You’re lesson was overdue

On heterogenous resistance

To submission

I will wrap your chord around my neck

Only to helicopter kick your attempt at pervasive control

I can walk in a straight line

If the guidance is fueled by pure intent

But my paranoid fingers twitch

At the hint of manipulation

Respectfully bowing out

Your poor attempt

At burying insecurities

Has left me with empathy

That will only surface once

Be at peace

My troubled friend

When It Hurts

This burst of energy

Crashed into my life

It almost killed me

More than one time

It also saved me

Mind body and soul

I’m selfish

Problem is




But it doesn’t change who you are

Confronting an inability

To wrap myself with pain

I collapsed

In the middle of a bridge

Only to be lifted

By the sweetest thought

Of you

Trusting eyes

Waiting to find home

Needing me to bring you there

A shell was built between you and I

Love only just started to melt that barrier

It made my chest cavity permanently hinged

To yours

With golden lining

I’ll love you when it hurts

I’ll hold you when you cry

I’ll feel every speck of dirt that goes into your lovely little eyes

I’ve got you

You’ve got me

I’ll be your mountain

You be my spring