Politician

Peel away

All of it

Stop shaking

Stop thinking

Stop hesitating

Your mind is a weapon 

With suicide scrolling through its bent halls

Empty faces 

With boxed up ears

Open funnel mouths

Spreading the coincidental tragedy 

Of what you could have been

The more you say

The more you explain

The more they back away

Even the listeners

Don’t like to hear

From mouths of the destitute 

Of the lost

Of the needy

Avoiding empathy at all costs

Gossip 

Hated more than lazy stagnation

Fills the void of contemplation 

Examination of unfortunate circumstances

A broken person was not delivered in poor condition

Molded by the thoughtless frustration of a fully formed being unable to cope with this world

The cycle continues 

I’ve been on both sides

Only thing worse than being a victim 

Is seeing evil corruption

When you look a reflection in the eyes

Battle


I’ve lost pieces of myself I don’t think I can get back

On this journey of forced self discovery 

I’m finding an empty shell

Of what was hollowed out years ago

Forgiveness was never requested

Neither was it given

It sits silently waiting for the next offender to stealthily creep in

Only to disappear 

Once the transplant organs have finally agreed to accept one another

Being ripped from beneath surgery’s scars

Because permanence no longer exists

Momentary complacency is all there is until someone gets bored 

Or tired

Or frustrated 

Your hatred of my self pity

Your belief it is a debt I fully charged against myself

Your disappointment in my unwillingness to accept the circumstances I was hesitantly remitted 

Because god dammit I worked too hard 

Bleeding from every overworked joint that cracks from the omission of peaceful rest

To ride a path only of simplicity 

Not immense wealth or fame

Enough to get by and not worry

About holes in the ceiling

And mice in the kitchen

Honoring the person I have earned the right to be

I will not be sold or compromised 

This battle is not done

Despite what you’ve heard

Money is not my king

I will live a fulfilled life 

Even if it is lived alone

Hand to Hold

You saw the world

I felt asphalt beneath my skin

You put a girl on a pedestal

I left the wreckage where it belongs

You are looking for an equal

I am looking for someone worthy of my undying love

That will cost total devotion

To a thing you can’t chain down

You will be asked to bend 

Until you break

Once it heals 

You’ll be asked to do it again

Strength and courage

Coated with unselfish love 

For things you didn’t create

Fastened with patience

For problems that existed before you 

This isn’t for the light-hearted

My burden has been anchored to my bones

I don’t want to put one foot in front of the other 

Without a hand to hold

But

My fists are clenched 

I’ll march to my grave 

If that’s the song that was written

If that’s the way it is

With eyes looking up

Chest heaving with pride

My body is strong

Want is a novelty I dream of at night

Need is something I’ve forgotten to feel

Bruised heels callous 

Hearts do the same

I trained myself for endurance 

Don’t ever forget 

You chose to walk away

Automaticity

There will come a day when the river violently rushes through

You will struggle to stand

The dirt will tumble into the water

Debris will knock you down 

The wind will welcome you back

Until the water reclaims you

You won’t have time to think

The automaticity in your muscles

In your bones 

Will find a way

Without acknowledgment of what is happening 

Your body will fight

To survive

Because we are born with a desire

To be

You will rise up

Seeing for the first time

The horrible disaster 

As it was

Find your way to the buildings that still stand

Tend to your wounds

Recounting the tragedy 

No one will truly understand

But they will see it

On your face 

When you pause

Revisit it in your mind

Without speaking

You will show us

In that moment 

That is when

(If we let it)

Humanity will rise

Stature

You stand in your confidence

What kingdoms you must have seen 

Rise and fall

Rebuild and dissipate 

I admire your stature

The way you don’t sway

The way you simply are 

Never intimidated or pressured 

You even fall with grace

Leaving a reminder of what you were 

No mistaking pure majesty

A shrine to your creator 

Without whispering His name

No opinion on other’s thoughts

Truth runs through you

Oxygen to deep roots

Feel your skin

Rough and untamed

Enjoy peace that is given 

Without a name 

You won’t change 

But someday 

We will destroy you

For no reason

Other than the ability

That was given

With an assumption of honor

We never earned 

And have yet to obtain

Remember 

I love the way you smile

Under cover

Needing acknowledgment for your effort

To get me to look inside

Big brown eyes

That see the world 

The way we always should

With a sense of hope 

In an adventure

You haven’t quite got planned

But know it’s there waiting for you

Possibility is never ending

I love you all around

Tiny toes 

To button nose

Fingers searching for hands to hold

Snuggles are our ritual

The kind I forgot

When emotions became frivolous 

And affection overrated

In the deadliest of ways

Life has a way of resurfacing

Remember the way I tried 

To always make life full

Of discovery and sunshine

To fill that curiosity 

I hope never goes away

I want to see you walk away

Looking at the sky

Building bridges and carving tunnels

Always reaching way up high

I’ve loved you since you were nothing more 

Than a tiny little flutter

Don’t wait for me

Keep on going 

I’ll watch you from the sea

As you soar in the sky

I’ll always love you 

Near or far 

I’ll always be your mother

Pressure

Can you turn it off

Tick tick tick

In the middle of the night

Open eyes

Darkness

Urgency

Towards nothing

Breathe in deep

Let it out

Spin spin spin

There will be no rest

Thoughts turn into thoughts

Keep it up

Keep going straight 

Through the tunnel

Under water

Deep sea diving 

Going farther 

And farther

And farther

Into deep blue

Air bubbles rising

Weightless floating

Inhale

Release

The only time I didn’t feel pressure was when standing next to you

Coasting

I’ve been crying on the floor

Laughing 

Stitching up both sides

Isn’t it funny when the world hangs upside down

Turns away from frowns

Makes living seem like a game

The best we play

Coffee break mornings

Bicycle afternoons

Evenings for pretending 

We won’t be leaving too soon

I’m a frightful mess

Up

Down 

All around

But when I got it

I got it bad

And it’s playing in my head

Skip that record, baby

All ends are dead

I’ll be your backup 

You be my just in time

This life is for living

For now

Coasting sounds just fine

I Am

I created angels from broken glass

Others only saw jagged edges

My vision was warped by their assumption

Monsters began to walk at night

Hiding in my own mummification

I numbed every cell that felt alive

Trying to cover up my shameful mistakes

Rotting flesh began to rise 

From the inside

It was my own

Until I stepped back 

Laughed

At the absurdity of expectations

Great and small

Claiming to have none

All of them were disgusted by their own inconvenience

How weak they must be 

To expect peace 

When life is nothing but a glorious battle

To survive

Bending down

Sweeping up ashes

I accepted what was lost

No longer will I be told what is right

I carved this road

Into the mountainside

Every curve

Every bend

I won’t flinch 

Or bat an eye

When tires squeal

To hug its sides

You don’t want to see

What’s on the other side

I never offered a free ride

This is my land 

I will drench her when she catches fire

And watch as the roots begin to grow

Again

I am 

And will remain

My Way

I’ve got giggles in both hands

Sometimes I make them cry

They pull open my eyes

I’m not doing it according to plan

People don’t like being surprised

Makes them think

Something must be wrong

Not following a dotted line

I don’t fake a smile

I tell you when I’m cold

I won’t be a model 

Example

Turning from the inside

It’s rough terrain

Discovering wings and legs we’ve never seen

Someone may ask to hitch a ride

If they don’t

We’ll be just fine

I feel too much

So I’ve been told

My heart is cold

So I’ve been scolded

I’m much too free 

So I’ve been reminded

I’m too rigid 

So I’ve been convinced

It’s so interesting how open we are

To critique each other’s lives

We keep on turning 

Revolving into each other’s past

I’ve got my little people 

You’ve got your big plans

I’ll watch you fly overhead

Plotting your investments 

One wise move at a time

I’ll look people in the eye

Tell them why I’m not afraid to die

We all have our way 

This is just mine