Nevermind

Here are the facts

In digestible bits

Your fences are guarded

As you run to home plate

Mannequin machine guns

Tilted in hand

You love watching

As people chant your name

But the risk of

Skinning a knee

(Arteries coming straight from the heart)

Is too great

So you

“Who’s on First”

Until no one knows their own name

But all the laughs get back to you

Praised for a good game

Jukebox after party

You don’t want it all to be the same

Being confined in small places

Was never your schtick

So you wander

And browse

Still carrying chains to what you consider safe

You leave doors open

Just in case

Seeing eyes that dazzle

Curiosity in mind

You start to wonder

Wander

Forget who’s in charge

Quickly you accelerate

And slam on the brakes

Because no one is going to tell you

Or have you

Or want you

That’s what it is

The voice in your head

You know

The asshole

The voice in your heart

Saying this can’t be right

They want something more

When in reality

She sees undefined shapes

In the sound of your voice

That remind her of a desert

That revealed cloudy stars

It’s the certainty you muster

It’s the charismatic charm

That gets her every time

But eventually you remind her

Of her own voice deep inside

Saying “they’ll never be mine”

So like two opposing magnets

You rip apart time

Avoiding something

That could have been

Should have been

Maybe

But could have been

Absolutely

It wasn’t an excuse

Money was never in mind

Just time with you

But I guess

Nevermind

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Far Off Galaxy

Needing more protection

I covered my back with broken branches

I woke up at night

Became one with the moon

I swam in the Milky Way

I breathed in too soon

Broke into a million pieces

Collided with the sun

I called you back over

You wanted to come

But didn’t know how to love me

When the daylight brought doom

I took over a far off galaxy

Broke into shapes of darkness

That fit only what they themselves defined

I woke up

Your arm around my resting head

It felt like summer

And smelled like rain

I saw a dandelion open

From inside

That’s how I knew

Portrait

Kicking at dirt

Only makes

A storm

Until it settles

Leaving the unseen

To be revealed

Someday

It will settle on you

Your reflection will be different than you expected

Good or bad

That’s what we we’ve always

Perceived

A kiss on both cheeks

Sending you on your way

We’ll not see each other for a while

Maybe never again

But never has the possibility of being broken

Just like forever

In a more optimistic way

Which has never been my chosen habitat

But when it comes to you

I always tend to smile

Even in the morning

When your eyes have frozen over

I don’t believe in frozen veins

Just a choice to disconnect

Often caused by a disappointment

Deeper than mutual like

Because the hardest love to find

Is an acceptance of self

Maybe someday

You’ll let me show you

All the ways you’ve lit up my thoughts

When the night turns to dust

And feet start to stomp

The powder will settle

Your truest portrait

Will be revealed

The grains of my flesh

Will be the stroke of the brush

As your canvas takes shape

You’ve never seen yourself

This way

Too Tight

It doesn’t matter what is remembered

It’s what is felt that engraves our hearts

With silhouettes

Of shaky fingers

Tingly toes

Blushing cheeks

Uncomfortable glances

Across an open floor plan

First moves

Barely bend

Trying to maintain

Forged shapes

At least we tried

To contain the ocean

Between skipped

Beats

Never quite keeping time

Rather letting it run

Until there was nothing

But a mountain of sand

We could use

To create a shaky foundation

Stability was never

Something

I fancied

Maybe something

I never had

My life fits in a hurried backpack

Dreams of holding

Home

In another’s fleshy hand

Stick in my failing eyesight

Squinting to remember

A feeling of belonging

Sometimes I feel it

And hold on too tight

Blind

I think there’s something wrong with your eyes

Something wrong with how you see the world

With how you see me

Most of the time

I don’t take pictures with potential lovers

No no

They fool everyone

To see something imposssible

I love

The nitty

Gritty

In between

How you look when you start

To have feelings

How you talk when

You wish I was yours

But you

Won’t

No

You

Won’t

Let me in

Fake filters

In between

Missed kisses

I see everything

The only thing

Between

You and I

Is Y!O!U!

In all caps

Exclamation after

Each!

Letter!

How I do

How I do

How I do

Think of you

Circumference

We were open and empty

When a light filled up the spaces in between

Overwhelming

In a euphoric sense

Your eyes spread shadows

Fear and doubt

Different isn’t always bad

But we are born to chase consistency

Even if all we’ve ever known was pain

It’s not until you are forced into constant change

Only then

After repetitive chaotic motion

You stop fearing what you don’t know

You stop questioning who you are

Knowing it’s only you

And that won’t ever change

It doesn’t mean you can’t swipe at the colors

As you are passing by

I’ve held this light in my hands

I’ve seen hair stand on end

Most beautiful beginning

Most brutal end

Everything moves in a circular path

I wonder what the circumference

Of you and I will be

Perfectly

Life was perfect

You completed your mediocre education at a not quite Ivy League

Married your semi-sweet half-hearted sweetheart

Had two perfectly spaced children

One adrenaline rich boy and one meek and mild girl

Lived a perfect Instagram framed life

In a perfect white washed house

You felt like something was missing

This is what you missed

The brokenness that inspires everything human

Heavenly or not

Nothing comes out of a “perfect” plan

Perfectly followed

Out of obligation

To a preordained way of life

That’s why they want to smother us out

The enlightened

The beaten

The comeback kids

The trailblazers exploring new ways

Making the earth change shapes

As we disturb the flow of time and space

Knowing the person we are proud to be

Came from being pushed around by all the people who did it “right”

Don’t plan on disaster

But realize tsunamis give little warning

Don’t build on broken pieces

But be aware that bridges built don’t last forever

Don’t refuse to ever feel again

Because the love you’ll find after being broken

Is mightier than all of the hurt you’ve ever known

If you let it be

Absence

What do you think about

In between

You

And

Me

Endless solar systems

Colliding

Into supernova

Black holes

Consuming themselves

Until time becomes

Calm

Slow moving

Your mind burns my eyes

Trying to follow you in a line

That begins where it starts and curves where it bends

Whispering condescension

Over my spine

Eyes looking up

Pretending

You’re mine

Even if I never catch that

White rabbit

I’ll never forget where he took me

While I tried and I tried

Fondness


Who is using whom anymore

It’s hard to tell

Letting legs rest together

To remember 

When Love was a feeling

When it seemed real

Not made up

Or fantasized

Impractical 

In our busy busy lives

Being old was an honor

Having loved one person 

A mother and father

Now we split ourselves into categories

Hold civility in obligatory meetings 

Pretend like it’s courting 

Comparing and judging 

Waiting to see who is next in line

I like it when you catch me off guard 

When you impress my mind

When you remind me of an excitement 

I thought I could find

When I was young

Still naive

I like the way you look at me

Maybe that’s enough 

To put in my locket

To pretend 

I don’t know what Love is anymore

But I’m fond of my fingers being laced in your hair

Chance

Watercolor clouds

Filtered by the sun

To show true colors

Of how it should be

With hope 

Promise

Most of all 

Courage

To face a new day

With confidence and vigor

Strength is the trigger

That catapults possibility into

An attainable place 

Under each eye

Just out of sight

But felt

Profile of your own nose

Knowing it is there

Knowing it is possible

Knowing love will ring true

When hearts open up

Stop trying to find more

Risk is a reward 

That gives unattainable power

To anyone brave enough to try

Take a chance on me