Who Am I to Say

I know it’s 

Faded

I know no one talks about it anymore

I know I’m all grown up

But sometimes I think about how it felt

That I was newly entering the world as a woman

And you didn’t want me 

To be your little girl 

Anymore

You didn’t want me to be anything 

Anymore

It was inconvenient for me to be taking up space in a frame on your wall

I said I didn’t care

As I broke empty bottles

I said I didn’t care 

As I let men throw me on the ground

I said I didn’t care 

As I tried my best to earn back your attention

But slipped back into self destruction 

Every time getting an award failed

Sometimes fathers forget what kind of powers they have over their daughters

And it doesn’t end at a number written on a page

It’s like having someone die

Only despite their blood in your veins

They choose to not want you

Every 

Single 

Day

You saw me read words

You saw me on roller skates 

You watched me drive around the parkway

Then one day you decided

It was time to start over

I didn’t know it could work that way

All of the promises and hopes and dreams

And thoughts of being walked down the aisle

Evaporated 

Like spilt milk

That nobody saw

Until its smell came through the vents

So they taped it off

And wiped the cement clean

Sprayed artificial scents until it wasn’t so obscene 

I don’t blame you for everything 

I really have grown

I am okay

I know how to stand up alone

But sometimes I see

Fathers walking a line

And I feel it again

And know

Sometimes a father can save a life 

Sometimes a father can force a life to save itself 

Who am I to say which way is right 

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