I’m Okay


I’m okay now

My recovery time has lessened

My one true fear

Someday 

I won’t feel it at all

I open my ribcage 

No cover to enter

It has allowed 

Too many evil doers in

I have to admit

You were one of my favorites

To write down

To remember

Maybe because we worked 

The hurt into the pleasure

Maybe because you never 

Led me on

Except when you said “maybe”

Except when you lost your mind

Except when you …

All the time

I fell into the trap

Maybe you didn’t even know you set

Dammit, why’d you have to come back

I can’t say what I really mean

Because that would be a revelation 

Admitting that some of it is still there

In my little finger 

The one with a freckle

Hiding that feeling

Hoping you’ll come back again

Because thinking…

No, I’m okay now

I’m okay

I don’t hear your voice 

The soft spoken

Wise ass 

That you were

I don’t see your face

That shapeless oval

That changed shapes when you smiled

I don’t feel your kiss

That made me melt

Instantly

Without fail

I don’t smell your dark hair

That always smelled like the summer air and felt like silk sheets between my fingers

No, I don’t remember any of those things

I’m okay now

I’m okay

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